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6 Crazy Conspiracy Theories Involving The Pyramids Of Giza

Tuesday - 9/7/21 - UFOs, Bigfoot and Pyramid Conspiracy Theories On tonights show we’ll discuss several new UFO and alien abduction stories from USAF airmen subject to abduction and abuse on the dark side of the moon, to recovered aliens in the New Mexico desert. We’ll also discuss the new film, Man vs. Bigfoot, by David Ford and how we may know a bit more about the behind the scenes. Also, the Pyramids of Giza have become the center of the wildest theories, bizarre ideas, and “alternative” science. We’ll discuss.

The Pyramids Are Actually Noah’s Ark:

The Pyramids are a giant boat is the latest theory by historian Mathew Sibson, who believes that the Pyramids are actually Noah’s Ark, used in the Genesis flood story through which God spares Noah, his family, and all the animals that received the invite to join (giants and dinosaurs showed up too late).

Based on a debate over the meaning of a Greek word, Sibson puts forth the idea that instead of describing the Ark as "tall," it actually describes it as pyramids. Logical.

Basing his theory around some dubious translations of the Dead Sea Scrolls, medieval Italian artists, and some impressive dot-connecting, Sibson states that, “the idea of a pyramid-shaped ark, of course, makes us think of ancient Egypt and we know that Egypt features heavily in the Old Testament.”

Seems plausible, look at those fish around the top the pyramid! Must have been a boat.

Aliens Built the Pyramids:

“You know those big stone structures out in Egypt? The ones which were supposedly built to house the remains of dead pharaohs??? The ones you thought were built by the Egyptians? Well, you are wrong! THEY WERE BUILT BY ALIENS! Let's take a look at some undeniable evidence....” Any website that starts like this seems really authoritative. Everything from the Predator aliens to Scientology’s Lord Zenu have been put forward as the puppet-master guiding human civilization from the beginning.

What’s the proof? The speed of light is 299,792,458 meters per second and the geographic co-ordinates for the Great Pyramid are 29.9792458°N COINCIDENCE??? I think not.

Theories of this ilk basically say that because the civilization that invented the calendar and was based on farming couldn’t possibly understand the stars, seasons, the days of the year, and the rotation of the earth must have gotten their technology from aliens. I mean, it’s not like they knew basic math and star-gazing, right?

Slaves Built Them

Jewish or non-Jewish, the idea of Ancient Egypt as a massive slave country has been propagated for centuries. In fact, despite the Torah and the story of the Exodus, researchers believe that the story of the Jews in Egypt was actually about their time in Babylon and that it was the Hyksos who were sent out of Egypt. In any case, the pyramids were already old by the time the Jews settled (as a free community) in the Nile delta, and even older by the time Pharaoh ordered them to leave.

Researchers believe that the pyramids were built by paid laborers, and skilled craftsmen. While slaves were used for domestic work, Egyptologists state that building projects were not undertaken with slave labor.

They are Hiding Advanced Technology Inside:

In the 1990s, a secret door was discovered inside one the Great Pyramids with red writing on the outside. Zahi Hawass allowed a robot to drill a small hole and peek inside. He then announced that nothing was found, but refused to give the video tapes as proof.

The Egyptian government forbade researchers from abroad to look for themselves. This spawned a host of conspiracy theories that the chamber had great treasure, and alien corpses that would disprove religion, or that Hitler, Steve Jobs, and Jimmy Hoffa were still alive and playing cards in the secret chamber!

They Were Built by Jesus’s Father to Store Wheat:

Based on the quote “squared stone and rubble,” biblical theorists have claimed that Joseph built the pyramids to store wheat grain. This one comes from Christians who want to take credit for the Pyramids themselves. The theory has been around since the 6th century, but came back after US Presidential candidate Ben Carson cited the theory.

When asked how Joseph may have gotten the technical expertise for such a feat, rather than say he got the plans from God, Carson surprised everyone with the obvious answer "Various of scientists have said, 'Well, you know, there were alien beings that came down, and they have special knowledge and that's how —"

They Are an Energy Source:

In files found in the storage of the Russian intelligence archives, the KGB researched the Pyramids of Giza and disclosed a report detailing a strange electro-magnetic power field surrounding them.

It read: “During inspection of the wall segment we noted an odd sensation, a magnetic repulsive force seemed to be emanating from the rock. We were unable to find any scientific explanation.”

This created the theory that the Pyramids are a massive energy power plant, like the Tesla coil, used to gather and transfer electricity through the air. Theorists claim this allowed the Egyptians to transfer energy to the Mayan pyramids.

However, despite all manner of tests, no difference in the electromagnetic fields inside or outside the pyramids have ever been recorded. You would have thought someone would have remembered that the Pyramids could light their houses, or maybe they just forgot where the on switch was located.

Illuminati Built Them!

Despite the fact that the Illuminati was officially founded in 1785, many people who point to Kayne West and Jay-Z as the Illuminati’s favorite rappers also point to their role in Pyramid creation.

The group took up the pyramid with the eye on top as their symbol with the Latin phrase, “One from Many”. Illuminati “scholars” state that the Latin actually means “New World Order,” and the eye on the pyramid and the Eye of Horus point to the Illuminati’s power through time.

However, this theory was proposed in a popular book series from the 1960s, not the original Illuminati, who were disbanded twenty years after their founding.

The book series was popular with the hippy movement who used it as a means of critiquing power elites. Many hippies made a semi-religious spirituality out of the narrative, and began praying in the pyramids to collect its power and energy.

Many of them would attempt to sneak into the pyramids, but were driven off by security for trespassing.

What do all these theories have in common? The unknown aspects of how and why the pyramids were built have allowed for different people to fill in the blanks with their own agenda.

Israelis, Christians, New Age spiritualists, and UFO hunters who have competition over historical narratives both wish to justify their grand theories of the world, and the pyramids of Giza are just one more battleground for proof.

They all assume Egyptians were too stupid to do it themselves, or that it couldn’t have been just for religious, cultural, and political motivation.

The actions of modern Egyptians, attempting to prevent foreigners from trespassing, vandalism, or unauthorized research has made conspiracy theorists more suspicious of what Egypt might be hiding, but more likely the government just doesn’t want a bunch of wackos ruining the last great wonder of the world.

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